Relationship Advice from a Psychometric Assessment?

Although we don't specialize in relationship advice, the eRep team are often asked variations of, "Which Core Values Index profiles get along and which ones don't?" We have heard many couples that take the CVI wonder if they have compatible profiles.

We often talk about how the Core Values Index and Top Performer Profile™ are one of the most effective sets of tools available to determine hiring fit and employment performance. Can this same approach be used to determine relationship compatibility, too?

To cut to the chase, it's complicated — but the CVI can provide some useful guidance about what to expect in both new and established relationships. It all comes down to one basic fundamental that we have discussed before: we see the world through our own CVI lens.

How You See Others

The world, in your eyes, functions based on a certain set of principles and practices according to your individual perspective. If you are a practical person, you have a certain expectation that things should be ordered and predictable. Chaos and disorder will ensue when things are spontaneous or poorly planned.

If you are a free spirit, you have certain expectations that the world should be spontaneous and fun. It is boring and tedious when things are ordered or overly planned.

Relationships are the same way. You see others through the lens of your own psychometric profile. When you meet someone who shares your profile, you click. Communication is easy and you can almost finish each other's sentences. You seem to have the same priorities and preferences.

Others see you through the lens of their psychometric profile. If your profiles don't match, you may find communication to be challenging at times. You may have different priorities and preferences about how things should function.

Are We Compatible?

Although there is no hard and fast rule that says this CVI profile is guaranteed to be compatible with that one, or these two will always butt heads, there are some guidelines about who tends to get along quickest with whom.

In general, those who share primary or secondary core value energies will tend to click faster and be able to communicate more effectively than those who don't share these energies.

For example, let's say Mark is an Innovator/Banker and his partner, Mary, is an Innovator/Builder. All things considered, Mary and Mark will likely have a smooth communication style and will approach most life situations in similar ways.

By counter-example, let's say Robert and Roberta have very different profiles. He's a Builder/Merchant and she's a Banker/Innovator. Although it's possible for anyone to get along with enough maturity and effort, these two would likely require a bit more work to see each other's point of view; it would take conscious effort.

The Key to Relationship Success

Many marriage counselors and relationship advice experts talk about the importance of communication. This is true! If you can't communicate, you can't get along. So what helps you communicate most effectively?

First, know yourself. Understand your own Core Values Index psychometric profile. Learn how you see the world, how you see others, and how you see yourself.

Next, study the profile energies of others. If you are a Merchant/Builder, after learning about your own profile, study the perspectives and attitudes of Bankers and Innovators.

As with any relationship, be it personal or professional, a little knowledge and effort goes a long way. As we stated at the opening of this article, we all see the world through the lens of our own Core Values profile. Understanding your own perspective, and then seeking to understand the perspective of others, will go a long way toward helping you establish productive and happy relationships with anyone, regardless of how different their profile may be from your own.